Herts County Squash

HERTFORSHIRE MENS SQUASH TEAM gained promotion to Division 1 unexpectedly at the weekend after sending just 4 (out of 5) players to Falmouth in Cornwall.

The team of Adam and Jonathan Fuller (Gosling) Neil and Adrian Waller (Potters Bar) Las Fernando (Radlett) and David Beattie (Cannons St.Albans) had done exceptionally well at Stage 1 to come second in their group and gain a place in the promotion weekend.

However, leading up to the weekend Adam Fuller became ill with tonsillitis, Adrian Waller was invited to Manchester for National Academy Squad training, Jonathan Fuller (exams/studies) Las Fernando and David Beattie (family commitments) left the team rather depleted.

I made telephone calls to several players including Chris Ryder (World no 125) but unfortunately he had a PSA commitment in Salzburg, Austria (but has shown interest to play for Hertfordshire next season) but to no avail.

Eventually a meagre squad of 4 were assembled and embarked on a long 6 hour journey to Cornwall on Friday, they were county Champion Marc Woolhead (R3 Stevenage), Neil Waller (Potters Bar), Chris Stanley (Berkhamsted) and me.

After a brief team talk and alot of team building drinks on Friday night it was decided to play me at number 1 string, Marc at 2, Neil at 3 and Chris at 4.

Even though I have been told never to play squash again by my knee surgeon and wife, the team unanimously decided to send me to the lions in the hope that we could secure wins at 2, 3 and 4.

The plan almost worked against Cornwall, Neil went off like a train against his opponent hoping to get off the court quickly after a recent bout of the flu, Neil ducked and dived into a 2-0 lead muttering the now immortal team phrase " COME ON, A B C, EASY AS 1 2 3 " in reference to the inspirational music from the Jackson's he had been listening to on his i-pod prior to the match. However at 2-0 up and 7-7 in the third game Neil's strength started to subside as his opponent took the game 9-7 and the match 3-2.

Meanwhile Chris Stanley had started nervously against a fit navy officer sharing the first two games, but in true style Chris found his range and shot his own missiles into the nick sinking his opponent without a trace to take it 3-1.

On came Marc to try and make the score respectable and that's exactly what he did as he calmly and assuredly beat his combatant 3-0 to make the match score 3-2 to them.

First on again was Neil who played a very stylish opponent, I leant across to Marc and said " I don't think he's gonna do this! " as Neil lost the first game 9-1, but in the second game the Avon player started to tire letting in Neil to win it 9-5 prompting me to change my mind and whisper to Marc " I think Neil can win this! ". In the third game Neil lost his way again as the Avon player re-exerted his authority on the game taking it 9-6 which led me to tell Marc that I didn't think Neil was going to win it now! From then on Neil stepped up a gear and played like a demon to beat his tired opponent and the match 3-2

Chris by now, after this mornings match was hitting the ball like a magician and despatched his lacklustre opponent easily to put the team 2-1 up.

I was 9-2 9-0 7-0 down against the Avon number 1 who started to feel sorry for me and in need of a sweat decided to hit the ball back to me, this was all the encouragement I needed to stage a comeback saving several match balls in the third to take it 10-9. By now my knees were warm. the ball was hot. I was seeing the ball well and my opponent started to panic, I took the fourth 9-6 and was 5-1 up in the fifth when my opponent suddenly remembered that I couldn't run and he went on to win the match.

It was now left to Marc to see us home, he was playing a tricky junior and the first game was tight with Marc winning it 9-7, this was just what we needed as Marc's controlled play proved to be too much for his young opponent taking the match 3-0 for Herts and a 3-2 WIN.

We all thought Cornwall were through and we just needed to beat Oxfordshire in the morning to stand a chance of getting promoted.

On Saturday night more team bonding commenced but disaster struck as Chris suffered an injury to his left wrist. He didn't know how he did it, but was in such excruciating pain holding his arm in the Indian restaurant that he decided to go back to the Hotel, take some pain killers and go to bed.

As usual the team showed little concern and sympathy for Chris who using their vivid imagination were certain that he had managed to sneak Kylie Minogue into his room at the Hotel!

Undeterred, but rocked by the loss of the now sympathetically named " THE CLAW " (because of the way he was holding his wrist) the 3 musketeers headed off to the local nightspots wearing a newly acquired team t-shirt.

The boys cut some serious shapes on the dancefloor clearing it within minutes! Soon realising that having London accents wasn't that interesting to Cornwall's finest the boys headed off back to the Hotel with the next days matches firmly on their minds.

Fortunately, our opponents from Oxfordshire did the same as us but stayed out a little bit longer rendering most of their team unplayable in the morning.

First on was Neil who was bouncing around the court like a young 'TIGGER', ghosting and hitting the ball with such vigour we pleaded with him to wait until his opponent actually arrived! When he did, Neil yelped and screamed his way to a 9-0 9-0 9-2 destruction of the Oxfordshire number 3.

Thankfully for us and Chris, he had recovered from his wrist injury and wasted no time in beating his hallucinating opponent for the loss of 2 points.

I lost my match 3-0 making the match score 2-2. On the other courts Avon were beating Cornwall 5-0 which meant that if Marc won his match we were through with Avon.

Marc zipped into a 2-0 lead but he was playing a tricky opponent who by the third game started to sober up, he was playing some outrageous winners of his own to win the third game 9-7. I could feel the colour of my face draining as Marc laboured to 5-5 in the fourth. But suddenly Marc went for the kill and played 4 unstoppable shots to take the match and rightly earn the nickname of " THE MAILMAN " as he duly delivered the result we needed.

This was a fantastic team performance and as county captain made me extremely proud. This is the first time that I have gained promotion as team captain and am very excited about the future of Hertfordshire Squash.

The Herts Squash leagues are well run and probably one of the best Leagues in the region and we have the players to prove it. Let's hope we can assemble them all together next year and get into the Premier Division.

Herts County Squash
HERTFORSHIRE MENS SQUASH TEAM HERTFORSHIRE MENS SQUASH TEAM gained promotion to Division 1 unexpectedly at the weekend after sending just 4 (out of 5) players to Falmouth in Cornwall. The team of Adam and Jonathan Fuller (Gosling) Neil and Adrian Waller (Potters Bar) Las Fernando (Radlett) and David Beattie (Cannons St.Albans) had done exceptionally well at Stage 1 to come second in their group and gain a place in the promotion weekend. However, leading up to the weekend Adam Fuller became ill with tonsillitis, Adrian Waller was invited to Manchester for National Academy Squad training, Jonathan Fuller (exams/studies) Las Fernando and David Beattie (family commitments) left the team rather depleted. I made telephone calls to several players including Chris Ryder (World no 125) but unfortunately he had a PSA commitment in Salzburg, Austria (but has shown interest to play for Hertfordshire next season) but to no avail. Eventually a meagre squad of 4 were assembled and embarked on a long 6 hour journey to Cornwall on Friday, they were county Champion Marc Woolhead (R3 Stevenage), Neil Waller (Potters Bar), Chris Stanley (Berkhamsted) and me. Our first match was against our hosts, Cornwall. After a brief team talk and alot of team building drinks on Friday night it was decided to play me at number 1 string, Marc at 2, Neil at 3 and Chris at 4. Even though I have been told never to play squash again by my knee surgeon and wife, the team unanimously decided to send me to the lions in the hope that we could secure wins at 2, 3 and 4. The plan almost worked against Cornwall, Neil went off like a train against his opponent hoping to get off the court quickly after a recent bout of the flu, Neil ducked and dived into a 2-0 lead muttering the now immortal team phrase " COME ON, A B C, EASY AS 1 2 3 " in reference to the inspirational music from the Jackson's he had been listening to on his i-pod prior to the match. However at 2-0 up and 7-7 in the third game Neil's strength started to subside as his opponent took the game 9-7 and the match 3-2. With no number 5 string we were now 2-0 down. BLAST! Meanwhile Chris Stanley had started nervously against a fit navy officer sharing the first two games, but in true style Chris found his range and shot his own missiles into the nick sinking his opponent without a trace to take it 3-1. I managed to win the third game before losing 3-1 which meant we were down 3-1. On came Marc to try and make the score respectable and that's exactly what he did as he calmly and assuredly beat his combatant 3-0 to make the match score 3-2 to them. Avon beat Oxfordshire 3-2 on the adjourning courts. On Saturday afternoon we faced Avon who had lost their numbers 2 and 3 to injury, was lady luck now going to shine on us! First on again was Neil who played a very stylish opponent, I leant across to Marc and said " I don't think he's gonna do this! " as Neil lost the first game 9-1, but in the second game the Avon player started to tire letting in Neil to win it 9-5 prompting me to change my mind and whisper to Marc " I think Neil can win this! ". In the third game Neil lost his way again as the Avon player re-exerted his authority on the game taking it 9-6 which led me to tell Marc that I didn't think Neil was going to win it now! From then on Neil stepped up a gear and played like a demon to beat his tired opponent and the match 3-2 GAME ON! Chris by now, after this mornings match was hitting the ball like a magician and despatched his lacklustre opponent easily to put the team 2-1 up. I was 9-2 9-0 7-0 down against the Avon number 1 who started to feel sorry for me and in need of a sweat decided to hit the ball back to me, this was all the encouragement I needed to stage a comeback saving several match balls in the third to take it 10-9. By now my knees were warm. the ball was hot. I was seeing the ball well and my opponent started to panic, I took the fourth 9-6 and was 5-1 up in the fifth when my opponent suddenly remembered that I couldn't run and he went on to win the match. It was now left to Marc to see us home, he was playing a tricky junior and the first game was tight with Marc winning it 9-7, this was just what we needed as Marc's controlled play proved to be too much for his young opponent taking the match 3-0 for Herts and a 3-2 WIN. Cornwall beat Oxfordshire 3-2 We all thought Cornwall were through and we just needed to beat Oxfordshire in the morning to stand a chance of getting promoted. On Saturday night more team bonding commenced but disaster struck as Chris suffered an injury to his left wrist. He didn't know how he did it, but was in such excruciating pain holding his arm in the Indian restaurant that he decided to go back to the Hotel, take some pain killers and go to bed. As usual the team showed little concern and sympathy for Chris who using their vivid imagination were certain that he had managed to sneak Kylie Minogue into his room at the Hotel! Undeterred, but rocked by the loss of the now sympathetically named " THE CLAW " (because of the way he was holding his wrist) the 3 musketeers headed off to the local nightspots wearing a newly acquired team t-shirt. The boys cut some serious shapes on the dancefloor clearing it within minutes! Soon realising that having London accents wasn't that interesting to Cornwall's finest the boys headed off back to the Hotel with the next days matches firmly on their minds. Fortunately, our opponents from Oxfordshire did the same as us but stayed out a little bit longer rendering most of their team unplayable in the morning. First on was Neil who was bouncing around the court like a young 'TIGGER', ghosting and hitting the ball with such vigour we pleaded with him to wait until his opponent actually arrived! When he did, Neil yelped and screamed his way to a 9-0 9-0 9-2 destruction of the Oxfordshire number 3. Thankfully for us and Chris, he had recovered from his wrist injury and wasted no time in beating his hallucinating opponent for the loss of 2 points. I lost my match 3-0 making the match score 2-2. On the other courts Avon were beating Cornwall 5-0 which meant that if Marc won his match we were through with Avon. Marc zipped into a 2-0 lead but he was playing a tricky opponent who by the third game started to sober up, he was playing some outrageous winners of his own to win the third game 9-7. I could feel the colour of my face draining as Marc laboured to 5-5 in the fourth. But suddenly Marc went for the kill and played 4 unstoppable shots to take the match and rightly earn the nickname of " THE MAILMAN " as he duly delivered the result we needed. FINAL RESULTS were; AVON 44 points HERTFORDSHIRE 39 points CORNWALL 33 points OXFORDSHIRE 25 points This was a fantastic team performance and as county captain made me extremely proud. This is the first time that I have gained promotion as team captain and am very excited about the future of Hertfordshire Squash. The Herts Squash leagues are well run and probably one of the best Leagues in the region and we have the players to prove it. Let's hope we can assemble them all together next year and get into the Premier Division. A big thankyou to all who played and helped during Stage 1 but especially to: Marc 'THE MAILMAN' Woolhead Chris 'THE CLAW' Stanley and Neil 'ABC, but really is the REAL DEAL' Waller. Jason Foster Captain and Chauffeur Sacrificial Lamb 'JOURNEYMAN' Regards, Jason Foster
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